Dear Universe;
You know that I was taught not to ask for
things that I don't need; so sometimes, I find it hard to ask You --
even though I really really KNOW that it is your desire to fulfill my
desires, and that is your Purpose.
I remind myself that You do not ask for
gratitude, and yet when I maintain an attitude of gratitude, things just
seem to flow more easily.
I imagine that it goes to being ready to ACCEPT the gifts that come -
gracefully.
I need some things, and here is my
conundrum:
I need SUCCESS. YOU certainly must know that
I do not define success by monetary measures -- and yet -- in the
dimension that I find myself, money is the energy that fuels practically
everything.
I need printing done in order to sell. I
need to sell in order to print more -- to sell. The more I can sell, the
more I can sell ... and sales are not just about feeding the machine.
I need tangible validation of my work. For
all that I admittedly do enjoy verbal appreciation for my art, the proof
of value is in sales. Given that the focus of my work is basically the
immortalization of a mortally-wounded part of the planet, sales
represents commiseration. When somebody invests in my efforts, that
evidences support: validation. VALIDATION I need.
In order to improve the quality of my work,
I need new lenses. If there is a way of procuring them that does not
require money ... well, I am certainly open to any options! Barter has
produced valuable results, in the past.
I need MOBILITY in order to reach out and
explore more areas to photograph. In my mind, mobility depends upon a
reliable vehicle, which includes meeting legal obligations. Insurance
and registration. These cost money. (Again, I'm open to any other
legal options.)
MOBILITY is a great asset to the kind of
photography I want to do, for while I never tire of the landscape that
surrounds me daily, I am inclined to think that there may be a limited
market for 40,000 different views of Telegraph Mountain.
I want to explore further. I need MOBILITY
to ensure successful photography. I'm not expecting to go around the
world, in the next few years. I would like to be able to approach the
next mountain range over. And the one after that.
Now, while we are about this
business of making dreams come true, we really must do something about
the vision problem. Forget about astigmatism, for the moment....
The floaty black things in my left eye are becoming quite a nuisance. I
keep thinking I am seeing a bird flying by in the periphery. How many
times, now, have I whirled around hoping to catch that teasing hawk,
only to realize the object is not in the sky, but in my own eye! I
really am grateful that it's in the left, rather than my shooting eye,
but somebody told me this can be indicative of cataract. Hereditary,
they say. Both grandmothers, my father, and brother had them. Easily
correctible with laser, I'm told. I don't know how it's going to
get done without insurance ... but I don't need to know how; just let me
know WHEN.
Now .... about that SMILE we discussed .... still waiting ....
